Monday, June 28, 2010

Freedom Lovers

The kids and I were on our own for the last few days. We met friends at Chuck E. Cheese on Friday then spent some time at Target with Grandma. On Saturday, we went to a fun birthday party at a bowling alley before the kids saw Toy Story 3 with Grandma and Uncle. (I was planning to see the movie too but we’ve had Toy Story 1 and 2 on a continuous loop at home for the last week. More than anything, I wanted to be without kids and toys, and movies about kids and toys, for just a couple hours. So I dropped them all off and stumbled upon dang good sales at H&M and Gap. No regrets.)

I let the kids stay up late and sleep in my bed. I encouraged them to sleep in late too, but Violet wasn’t taking the hint . . . who wakes up at 6:30 a.m. on the weekend? My four-year-old, that’s who. But overall, we had a lot of fun and good conversation.

One of my favorite conversations of the weekend was this morning. I was savoring my coffee after a close call. First thing, I discovered that I had somehow dusted my supply of coffee beans the morning before, and I had no one to blame but myself – how annoying is that. Refusing to give up the fight to stay in my pajamas as long as possible, I hacked through my crappy freezer that is in the “iced over/frozen hard” part of its dysfunctional cycle, which is only slightly better than the “not cold enough/everything’s melted or going bad” part of the cycle. I was thrilled to excavate a random leftover coffee bag at the bottom of the freezer with just enough for one full pot.

(Have I told you about my relatively new, worthless LG refrigerator? Do not believe the whole Life Is Good thing. I’m telling you it’s a lie. Their slogan should be: Life Is Barely Functional, and Whatever Is Still Working After Six Months Will Break Soon Thereafter. It seriously makes me so mad, I compose imaginary complaint letters in my head to calm down. I don’t think there’s anyone at that company who really cares if life is actually good.)

OK, so where was I? Oh right. I was clutching my coffee this morning, blinking and adjusting to a new day while Daisy was sitting on the couch a few feet away. She turned to me and said, “Mom, I want to do exactly what I want to do.” OK. “I mean, I want to do WHATEVER I FEEL LIKE DOING for the rest of my life.” Um. “I want freedom to do whatever I want and I’M GOING TO DO WHATEVER I WANT TO DO FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE. I’m just going to do it.” I wondered what more could a six-year-old possibly want after all the fun and games her mama had recently provided. I mean, how was I holding her back? “Mom, I want total freedom.” As usual, Violet echoed her older sister’s sentiment, “Me too!”

I explained that we all think we want total freedom, but that probably wouldn’t be good for us. If we did whatever we wanted all the time, it would actually turn out to be what we didn’t want. Obviously, I was early in the caffeine intake. What made me laugh was how condescending Daisy’s response was. She kept correcting me, “No, Mom. You don’t understand.” Actually I do. You don’t think I do, but I really really do. However, you’re probably going to think I don’t get it for at least another 15 years or so - especially when your soul temporarily leaves your body after puberty hits, and then I will seem straight up crazy to you. The feeling will probably be mutual. BUT THEN, at some point in your twenties, I will seem like the smartest and most sane person you ever met. Just you wait.



  1. Hi there, just wanted to stop by and thank you for commenting on my post regarding respect for those with disabilities. You asked if I thought I was perfect. Of course I'm not. The incident that inspired the post made me realize how often all of us make off-handed comments without thinking first. I'm sure there has been more than one occasion when I offended someone with my choice of words. My point in writing the post was to start a dialog regarding the casual use of certain expressions. I learned a great deal based on the comments I received both supportive and those who disagreed with me.

    The value of having open discussions is that we have the opportunity to hear different points of view. This helps us grow and I'm always open to that.

  2. I agree with your general sentiment here but I don't think your openness came through in your original post or in the discussion that followed. That's fine. It's your blog and you were venting.

    I wasn't really asking you personally if you thought you were perfect. It was a rhetorical question in response to what I felt was a self-righteous tone in many of the comments. Just because someone describes themselves as having "Bitch Tourettes" doesn't mean they are intending insult or injury to people with Tourette's. One commenter even described it as "cruelty." I agree with "Beth" in that it's too easy to be offended. If you really want to have a dialog, you might consider kindly letting the original blogger know why you were offended.

    Thanks for stopping by.

    (If you're confused and want to know more, you can read the post and comments here: I think I might be having my first blog fight! JUST KIDDING.)

  3. Hi Star Mama, I just remembered that I left this comment and stopped back to see if you replied. No fighting going on here. LOL! As a matter of fact, I am always open to opposing comments, I feel like I grow from them and sometimes change my tune a bit. Since Beth, who writes a wonderful blog, made her remarks, it has made me reexamine my own use of words and phrases.

    I clearly see what you are saying. I don't think that the original post or the author was intended as an insult. I think society in general is so cavalier about the use of certain expressions and the idea of political correctness is pooh-poohed these days.

    You are very articulate and I welcome your comments on my blog any time.

  4. Well, flattery is always welcome and I will DEFINITELY be commenting on your blog again soon :)

    Thanks for the debate!